Me. At least after what I've been through.
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
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