i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
