Why are handjobs necessary in class?
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
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