it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
Randomize
