Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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