the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
