I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
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