Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
North Korea, Best Korea!
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
Randomize
