making cat noises will not fix the situation.
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
Randomize
