I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Randomize
