Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Randomize
