i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
Randomize
