carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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