didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Randomize
