HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
Randomize
