guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
no. you can't hotbox the world.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Randomize