I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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