he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
