If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
Randomize
