Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
Randomize
