Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
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