We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
Randomize
