his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
when are you leaving homes?
it's 7:51. why the fuck are you awake at 7:51
I had a sex dream about Oprah.
go back to sleep
dude. it was a sex dream. about. Oprah.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
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