I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
Randomize
