Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
if i died would you start the facebook group?
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
Randomize
