It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
