I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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