He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
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