Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
We named our party play list daddy issues
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize
