NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
Randomize