You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
Fuck me I smell like cheese
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Randomize
