I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
Randomize
