I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Randomize