I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
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