and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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