can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
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