i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
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