Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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Sorry DizzyDawgFizzle hasn't picked any favorites yet.

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(248): View more from Michigan

Sry I called you an 8

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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid

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(704): View more from North Carolina

You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.

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(630): View more from Illinois

dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!

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(818): View more from California

I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter

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(847): View more from Illinois

I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.

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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is

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(519): View more from Ontario

I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on

(226): View more from Ontario

Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see

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(702): View more from Nevada

Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?

(725): View more from

Is there a big difference?

(702): View more from Nevada

It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker

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