Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Randomize
