I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
