I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
Randomize
