Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
i may or may not be watching the land before time
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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