school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
Randomize
