You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
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