VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
Randomize
