No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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