guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
Randomize