Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Randomize
