My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
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