I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
