I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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